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LOCAL BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT

LIVING BETTER WITH BETH

An interview with Beth Poulin.

So your business is called Live Better With Beth. What’s that about?

Good question. I sell a product that helps people with many different physical, emotional and life issues without the reliance on drugs or ingredients.

How can you eat them if there are no ingredients?

That’s the point. You don’t. You wear them. I sell a product called The SuperPatch that has patterns that send signals to your brain that help you overcome things like pain and fatigue, to name a few.

OH. They’re like a patch!

Not like a patch. They are patches.

Where do you wear them?

Um, on your skin.

Like my forehead?

Well, no, I wouldn’t wear them there it might look a bit silly, but you can put them on other parts of your body.

How about the soles of my feet?

Well... probably not there either.

Why not?

Because they might fall off.  Our feet can get pretty sweaty.

Tell me about it. Sometimes in the summer I have to wring my socks out before...

OK, OK, I get the picture.

What about my palms?

Why would you wear them on your palms?

So I know where they are!

I wouldn’t suggest wearing them on your palms. I'm sure they'd get in the way. I like to wear mine on my shoulders or chest.

So you have patches that help with a lot of issues like sleeplessness, addiction, pain, low energy and even allergies, and that’s just for starters, but do you have one that prevents people from saying the wrong thing in company?

What?

You know, a patch that would prevent, say someone like me, from saying something embarrassing when I’m around, let’s say, my in-laws or something.

Um, I’m afraid we don’t have a patch like that.

Why not?

Well, um, it’s just not, um… we just don’t.

You should.

I’ll bring it up with the inventor. Maybe he can work on it.

Tell him I really need that patch.

You know there is one way you could use any one of our patches to stop you from saying the wrong thing in public.

Excellent. How?

Wear it on your mouth.

Beth Poulin from Live Better With Beth seen here looking off into the distance like you do.

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I’m a pet name consultant.
Here’s what pet parents should consider when looking for a unique name for their animal

When pet parents step into my office for a naming consultation, they’re usually hoping to find an original sounding name that fits their pet’s personality. Most parents are looking for a unique name. It's not as easy as you think. You’ve really got to search your soul, or at least the internet, for that perfect sounding moniker.

I send my clients home with a list of about 20-30 name choices. The three things I rate a pet’s name on are Practicality, Impact and Day-To-Day Living.  Practicality: Do you really want to name your dog Here Boy for instance? Chances are you’ll end up getting more than

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one dog when you call it out in a park.  Or, does the name Roody go well with your last name if it’s Ripley? If you have a dog named Snuggles, do you really want to name your new cat Bug?

Impact: Will the name you choose make your pet feel good about itself? Naming your dog Fluffy might seem cute, but what will it do to its psyche? Is it actually fluffy at all? If not, what message are you giving? Remember, your animal will have this name for its entire life. How will it feel about being called Fluffy, or Mr. Cookies when it is in its dotage?

Day-to-Day Living: When naming your animal you want to look for potential unwanted nicknames. If you think the name Dumpers sounds unique, and it does, maybe imagine how your pet will feel when you call them in to dinner. Will their pet friends laugh at them or tease them?

And that’s why people pay me huge amounts of money to help them avoid the minefield that is naming your pet. It can be challenging work, but when I see a puppy leave my office with a name it can be proud of, it all becomes worthwhile.

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LOCAL NEWS IN BRIEF

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MOVING FORWARD ALL LOCAL COUNCIL MEETINGS WILL NOW BE HELD IN SONG

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“No more boring speeches or long-winded meetings,” says councillor Sing Salong, “it’ll be all singing all the time. When we asked why, Salong responded, “Things were so dull that the public stopped coming to our meetings. Now everyone will want to be there.” We asked if the public would have to sing as well when voicing their opinions and concerns. “Of coarse,” said Salong, “Everybody has to sing!” Yup. Good luck with that.

LOCAL PET FOOD COMPANY HIRES NEW TREAT TESTER

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Buddy Bites, a local dog treat company has hired Rolo, a Blonde Labrador, to be it’s newest employee. Rolo’s job will be to scrupulously test all new products, judging them on taste, presentation, texture and smell. Rolo will start work on Monday, March 4th and will be paid in doggy treats. We caught up with Rolo for a brief exchange. When we asked him how he felt about his new position with the company he said, “Rowf!” Good boy, Rolo. Good boy.

NEW CAR ALARM WILL SCREAM OUT OWNER’S FULL NAME IN MOTHER’S VOICE

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We are all familiar with the blaring sound of a car alarm that no one pays any attention to because, let’s face it, they all sound the same. Not anymore. Local inventor Willy Lowood has created an alarm that screams out your first, middle and last names in your mother’s voice, getting progressively louder the longer you ignore it. Chances are, potential thieves will jump as high as you do. Police expect a lot fewer car thefts when this hits the market.

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